12 Traits of a Narcissist You Might Be Ignoring (and Shouldn’t)

Narcissists can seem charming and confident at first. The problem is that once you get to know them, you’ll find they lack genuine empathy and have an intense need for validation. They have a constant need for attention and admiration. At the same time, they’re quick to put other people down if it makes them feel superior. They other people challenge them, they can get defensive or even lash out. That makes it tough to maintain a healthy relationship with them.

The following are 12 narcissistic traits you might notice:

1. Exaggerated self-importance: They often see themselves as unique or superior to others.
2. Need for admiration: Thrives on compliments and constant validation.
3. Lack of empathy: Struggles to understand or care about others’ feelings.
4. Sense of entitlement: Believes they deserve special treatment.
5. Manipulative behavior: Uses others to achieve their own goals.
6. Jealousy: Feels envious and thinks others are envious of them.
7. Arrogance: Displays an air of superiority.
8. Preoccupation with success: Obsessive focus on power, success, and status.
9. Sensitive to criticism: Quick to anger or retaliate when criticized.
10. Belittling others: Undermines people to feel more powerful.
11. Difficulty maintaining relationships: Has trouble keeping close, healthy connections.
12. Hypersensitivity: Responds to even small slights with strong emotion.

Understanding Narcissistic Traits

Narcissistic traits range from mild to severe. It’s also important to note that having one or two traits doesn’t mean someone is a full-blown narcissist. The problem is when there is a persistent pattern of such behaviors that can indicate narcissistic personality disorder (NPD).

When someone has a lot of narcissistic behaviors, it makes relationships really difficult. They don’t have the empathy and mutual respect needed in a healthy relationship. 

It’s important to know how to recognize these 12 traits of a narcissist so that you can set boundaries and manage how you interact with them.

What Are Some Obvious Signs Someone Is a Narcissist?

Some signs that someone might be a narcissist include:

Gaslighting

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They Never Admit They Are Wrong

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Blaming Others

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Huge Sense of Entitlement

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Remember, just because someone has ONE narcissistic trait, that doesn’t mean they are a narcissist or have NPD. Most of us do some of things at least sometimes. It’s when the behavior is a consistent pattern and involves multiple narcissistic traits that problem start to emerge.

Examples of Narcissistic Traits in Everyday Life

It’s one thing to label and define narcissistic traits and another actually to recognize them in real life. Sometimes, they’re obvious, but in other cases, they can be subtle.

Imagine a friend who constantly brings conversations back to themselves. No matter the topic, they steer it around to their own achievements or struggles, often ignoring what others are sharing—this is classic exaggerated self-importance.

Then there’s the boss who craves constant praise, making it clear that no one’s efforts compare to theirs. They might take credit for team successes, needing constant admiration and assuming they’re the smartest in the room.

In relationships, a partner with lack of empathy might dismiss your feelings, brushing off concerns as “overreactions” or saying you’re “too sensitive.” For them, only their feelings seem valid.

Or you might think of that friend who gets super upset when things don’t go their way. They end up resorting to subtle jabs or passive-aggressive comments, which is a great example of hypersensitivity to criticism. These behaviors can make others feel drained or even anxious. If you’ve ever known a narcissist, you know what it’s like to have to walk on eggshells to avoid setting them off.

These examples show how narcissistic traits play out in daily life. In many cases, it involves a narcissist elevating themselves at the expense of those around them.

Tips for Dealing with Narcissistic Traits

What can you do if you find yourself interacting with a narcissist? Some strategies that can help include:

1. Create (and enforce) boundaries: Decide what behaviors you won’t tolerate, and stick to them.
2. Try to limit your emotional reactions: Narcissists often feed off reactions, so staying calm can help reduce conflict.
3. Focus on the facts as best you can: When discussing issues, keep it logical rather than emotional.
4. Make sure you have support: Talking to friends or a therapist can provide perspective and guidance.
5. Know when to cut ties: If interactions are consistently harmful, consider limiting or ending contact.

These strategies can make interactions with narcissistic individuals more manageable.